There is a story (probably apocryphal) that the comedian Louis C.K., burns his jokes, his stand-up material, and his writing after successfully delivering it at the end of each year. This story reads like a corollary to the idea (popularized through the constant repeating of the alleged actions of the Read more…
Most, if not all, of the problems and conflicts in organizations, stem from cultural issues, baked in before you started working there. “This is how we do things here.” (Status quo) “Isn’t everything going great here?” (False expectations/Poor feedback loop) “Don’t say anything and it’ll just get ‘better’ on its Read more…
The thing about getting to the resolution of a conflict situation is that it is a long road, from the initiation of a conflict to a resolution of a conflict. And since it’s a long road, the bumps, the twists and the turns are what interests us as spectators. Those Read more…
The moment when your mind opens, a new idea resonates with you at an emotional frequency you didn’t know you possessed; this is the “A-HA” moment. Dismissing an idea that doesn’t open your mind, that doesn’t resonate with you at any emotional frequency, actively rejecting the effort of the other party Read more…
When someone asks you for validation about their approach to managing a conflict, what they are really asking for is reassurance that they are doing the right thing. But since validation can only come from gatekeepers, and since gatekeepers have significantly less power in the world now than they ever Read more…
If most negotiations are about whose version of reality will win, who decides what reality is? If many negotiations result in win-lose outcomes, are the “losers” as committed to the ultimate agreement as the “winners” are? If some negotiations happen because either party doesn’t ask the “right” questions, then what Read more…
The voice is a communication channel. So is a pen, a piece of paper, a keyboard, a desktop computer, or even a mobile phone. So is a television screen, a computer screen, and a mobile phone screen. The eyes, the hands, the body are communication channels. So are mobile applications, Internet platforms, Read more…
Consuming content and ideas passively, instead of creating content actively. Reacting to an idea immediately, instead of responding with critical thinking. Seeking assurance of safety and stability, instead of anchoring in ambiguity. Collaborating without courage, instead of connecting in all the ways that make us uncomfortable. Desiring information without wisdom, Read more…
When analyzing a problem to move forward towards a solution, there is a lot of emphasis placed on the fundamentals of the problem. We place a lot of importance in understanding, revisiting, and honoring the fundamentals of a problem, because they come, not from conceived wisdom, or even perceived wisdom, Read more…
“My boss doesn’t care about fixing disagreements between employees around here.” “My boss is the cause of all the problems around here.” “My boss has never shown an interest in doing any of the things that you’re talking about.” “My boss is never going to come to any of these Read more…